It's hard to sort my thoughts into clear prioritized reasons. Listing as "1, 2, 3..." means that one is either the most or the least upsetting. I guess I'll write them in "bullets," rather than number them.
- I remember the terror attack in which Arab terrorists murdered some of the Tzur family.
- I remember that Yoel Tzur, the bereaved father and widower was given the opportunity to develop the Ulpana neighborhood in the memory of his wife and son.
- I remember the buildings being built and how they looked when they were new.
- I remember losing my faith in Moetzet YESHA during the painful time leading up to Disengagement. I remember a ride in a taxi from a demonstration and what the driver said: "It's so obvious that Disengagement will be bad for the country, that the fact that Moetzet YESHA hasn't succeeded in getting it canceled means that there's something wrong with Moetzet YESHA."
- I finally realized that Moetzet YESHA is working with the government of the State of Israel before Gush Katif became not only judenrein but the launching pad for deadly missiles against Israel.
- I remember the horror of Amona and how the "government forces" attacked innocent Jews, among them my students and their teachers.
- I could see the ulpana neighborhood drama play out as deja vu.
- The government did, too and put lots of pressure on the Beit El people so there wouldn't be those fantastic inspiring pictures of young Jews defying the armed riot squad police.
- The final terribly silent evacuation of those houses reminds me of when the family of a severely injured or dying person is put under pressure by the doctors to "pull the plug," while some protest that he/she is still alive.